Your Ultimate Bridal Survival Guide
Here’s how to keep the peace and still have the crowd you want
Ceremony considerations
Five things you and your fiance should discuss before meeting with your officiant:
- Choose your battles, be firm, but give in if it’s a small issue and it looks like emotions are running wild. Arguments aren’t worth winning if they mean you and your mom aren’t speaking.
- Divvy the peeps evenly. If your parents want to invite 30 friends, then you should give your groom’s folks the same option.
- Ditch the “and guest”. Pals who don’t have a long term love can attend solo. Tell singles that space is tight.
- Skip your co-workers. If you don’t hang with your colleagues outside of the office, leave them off the list. If you can, though, invite your boss or assistant.
- Cut the munchkins. Be clear and consistent if you're asking parents to leave their kids at home. For example, make a “nobody under 18” or “just nieces and nephews” rule.
- Avoid the chain gangs. If putting just one person on your list compels you to add the six others you associate with him or her, then drop them all.
- Stagger the invitations. This tip is our least favorite, but if it will keep you from strangling your parents, or his, try it: have an a-list of “must be invited people”, and a b-list of “it would be nice to have people”.
- Send a-list invites out about 10 weeks before the wedding. For every regret, mail out a b-list invite. Don’t send a b-lister out later than one month before the big day.
Ceremony considerations
Five things you and your fiance should discuss before meeting with your officiant:
- The type of ceremony you both envision. Traditional and religious? Interfaith? Non-religious yet spiritual?
- Whether you would like to say anything to each other (aside from traditional vows.)
- Any religious or cultural rituals that you would like to incorporate, such as lighting of the unity candles or breaking a glass or jumping a broom at the end of the ceremony.
- Special reading you’d like to include (a favorite poem, an anecdote about your first date, etc.)
- Particular relatives you’d like to honor by mentioning them, or with a symbolic gesture (wearing a piece of jewelry or a religious item of theirs for example.)
- You must have a South Carolina marriage license to be married in South Carolina. No exceptions.